Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
swordfish

Memes - Abandon all hope - Ye who enter....

Recommended Posts

Some deep thinking book titles for today.....

Image may contain: possible text that says 'I CAN'T GET PARAGRAPH THROUGH A 3 EMAIL BUT I'LL WATCH WORK A 7 MINUTE VIDEO OF A PUPPY WITH THE HICCUPS A TODAY'S STUDY OF ATTENTION HUMAN SPAN @Story0PMyadmglife'

Image may contain: possible text that says 'GREAT MYSTERIES OF OUR TIME: said something out loud 3 days ago and now I'm seeing ads for it on Facebook @Story0fMyiagLife'

No photo description available.

No photo description available.

Image may contain: text

Image may contain: possible text that says 'My Resumé SPECIAL SKILLS Putting trash in an already full trashcan without anything spilling out. @StoryOfMybmgLife'

Image may contain: possible text that says '"Per My Last Email" And Other Phrases For Being Petty In Work Emails While Also Maintaining An Air Of Professionalism @StoryDfMy ngLife'

Image may contain: possible text that says 'SMART INVESTING MADE EASY How Having No Money To To Invest Makes Investment Choices Incredibly Easy @Story0PMyiplife'

No photo description available.

Image may contain: possible text that says 'Learning To Live With A Loved One Who Is One Of Those People Who Stands Up As Soon As The Plane Lands @StoryOPMylpu'

Image may contain: text

Image may contain: possible text that says 'This Glass Of Water Is Literally The Best Thing I ve Ever Had & Other Signs You Don t Take Care Of Your Body @StoryOfMyd mgllfe'

Image may contain: possible text that says 'So You Think You Can Hold In A Fart For 3 Hours? A Field Guide For First Dates @Story0fMyFuekingLife'

Image may contain: text

Image may contain: possible text that says 'Fishing The Box Out Of The Trash Because Didn't Read The Directions Before Throwing It Away A cooKBooK @StoryOPMyStaglife'

Image may contain: possible text that says 'TODAY MY APARTMENT WAITED INSIDE I COULD BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT UNLOCKING HEAR MY NEIGHBOR HER DOOR AND TO MAKE SMALL TALK @StoryOfMydrgLife @Story'

No photo description available.

No photo description available.

No photo description available.

Image may contain: possible text that says 'Googling A Phone Number That Called Me To Try And Figure Out Who It Was Instead Of Just Answering Fctnj Adult It Like a Paste MYSTERY A @StoryOFMyiagLife'

Image may contain: possible text that says 'PHILOSOPHY'S GREAT QUESTIONS ARE THEY MAD AT ME OR HAVE ANOTHER CREATED FOR MYSELF THAT PROBLEM ONLY EXISTS IN MY HEAD? @StoryOFMyd'

 

  • Thanks 1
  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How to tell if someone is a Republican, a Democrat, or just a Southerner.
Are you a Republican, a Democrat, or a Southerner? This little test will help you decide:
You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you…
You are carrying a Kimber 1911 chambered in .45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
******************************
Democrat’s Answer:
Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question! What is a Kimber 1911 and what does .45 ACP mean?
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. This is all so confusing!
******************************
Republican’s Answer:
BANG!
******************************
Southerner’s Answer:
BANG!
BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click…..
(Sounds of reloading)
BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
Click.
Daughter: “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Speer Gold Dots or Federal Premium hollow points?!”
Son: “Can I shoot the next one?!”
Wife: “You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist!”

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, swordfish said:

How to tell if someone is a Republican, a Democrat, or just a Southerner.
Are you a Republican, a Democrat, or a Southerner? This little test will help you decide:
You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you…
You are carrying a Kimber 1911 chambered in .45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
******************************
Democrat’s Answer:
Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question! What is a Kimber 1911 and what does .45 ACP mean?
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. This is all so confusing!
******************************
Republican’s Answer:
BANG!
******************************
Southerner’s Answer:
BANG!
BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click…..
(Sounds of reloading)
BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
Click.
Daughter: “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Speer Gold Dots or Federal Premium hollow points?!”
Son: “Can I shoot the next one?!”
Wife: “You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist!”

Sadly I counted the bangs to make sure there was the proper amount, eight followed by seven, I guess that answers the question for me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Impartial_Observer said:

Sadly I counted the bangs to make sure there was the proper amount, eight followed by seven, I guess that answers the question for me.

Interesting - the second clip must not have fully loaded....Also not sure since I don't own a Kimber, but I think there wouldn't be a "click" after running the mag dry......Normally a semi-auto stays open.  Also, the shooter obviously wasn't carrying it cocked and locked with one in the chamber since the clip capacity is 8......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
19 minutes ago, swordfish said:

How to tell if someone is a Republican, a Democrat, or just a Southerner.
Are you a Republican, a Democrat, or a Southerner? This little test will help you decide:
You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you…
You are carrying a Kimber 1911 chambered in .45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
******************************
Democrat’s Answer:
Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question! What is a Kimber 1911 and what does .45 ACP mean?
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus. This is all so confusing!
******************************
Republican’s Answer:
BANG!
******************************
Southerner’s Answer:
BANG!
BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click…..
(Sounds of reloading)
BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG!
Click.
Daughter: “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Speer Gold Dots or Federal Premium hollow points?!”
Son: “Can I shoot the next one?!”
Wife: “You are NOT taking that to a Taxidermist!”

How many Terrorists have carried out a Terrorist Knife attack in the U.S.? Shouldn't he have a bomb?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 minutes ago, swordfish said:

Interesting - the second clip must not have fully loaded....Also not sure since I don't own a Kimber, but I think there wouldn't be a "click" after running the mag dry......Normally a semi-auto stays open.  Also, the shooter obviously wasn't carrying it cocked and locked with one in the chamber since the clip capacity is 8......

Assumed locked and cocked. My Springfield Range Officer only has 7 in the mag, 1 in the pipe. Classic Colt M45A1 mags only held 7.

Quick search of Kimber's site lists 7, 8, and 10 capacity for their 1911 Government Commander.

Edited by Impartial_Observer

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, gonzoron said:

How many Terrorists have carried out a Terrorist Knife attack in the U.S.? Shouldn't he have a bomb?

Good Point.  Replace the Terrorist with a hoodlum....

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, Impartial_Observer said:

Racism.jpg

*groan* 🙂

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...